I am sorry, Cheyenne!

I am sorry that sometimes Mama is harsh like last night. I should have been more patient and kinder to you.

I am sorry that I am not understanding sometimes. Instead, I ended up imposing my ideas to you without giving you time to think and understand where I am coming from. I was too demanding and intrusive and failed to forget that you are a growing individual that sometimes a day's demand can be too taxing.

I am sorry that I close my ears sometimes and not hear you.  I should give you my 100% attention.

So, I know what I am going to do now.

- i will talk to you gently when I feel irritated at you
- i will be very open of how I feel but not intrusive
- i will try very hard to be patient and this last thing will never change
- i will love You endlessly

And incase you forgot, these are the things that I adore about you.

- You are a smart, happy, joyful girl
- You have that mature disposition and I am so proud of how you manage your day to day independently
-  You always look at brighter side of things and certainly would like more of your fun and quirky side.
- And finally, you came from me and you stole my heart completely.  Nothing can ever change that.

I want you to know that I don't desire you to be PERFECT  , so don't work too much on that. I want you to be happy, helpful , independent , strong but gentle. I know these things will sound ironic but the right time will come when you fully understand and you will choose for yourself which road you are going to take. Whatever that choices will be, I will be here all the way.

Forgive me of my shortcomings, Cheyenne.  Mama is not perfect too.

This photo throwback circa 2014, Hunter Valley

i need POSITIVE Diversion

So, i had to knock into my creative energies to give me a breather.

A breather from people I don't want  to associate with. A breather from conversations that make me NUTS! A breather from people who are impatient, immature and have so much confidence in themselves.  Arrogant, RUDE or should I say selfish, too much LOVE for themselves.

There are people coming and going in our workplace due to the restructure. It is such a happy place before but has now generated too much negative energy. Luckily, I will have the job till end this year but I have uncertainties ahead. Oh, yes, I have and is making me unsure of the future moves, plans but will have give me enough time to prepare for indeed a BIG wave of change is COMING!

So here's a result of the creativity that I have been wanting to do since we arrived from NZ trip.

That Day we Landed on Glaciers
Perhaps one of the most epic, expensive and exciting ride of this lifetime!
This by the way is Cheyenne's favorite in all our NZ escapades. Sometimes, It is hard to please this girl. But I won't forget what she told me the moment we landed Queenstown airport in the midst glacier mountain tops.

She said; " I don't believe Changi Airport (Singapore) is the best airport in the world, it is Queenstown Airport. " How naturally , beautiful it is!

I have to agree. What she said is true.  The place is epic , deserving of Middle-Earth!