Tuesday, October 10, 2017

and this write up

Relevant and concise. That is what I got from this writer. Daniel Wong.
A very good reminder to a mom like me who is in the rollercoaster ride. 
But I assure you, life is good. 
Don't be afraid of the responsibilities of Motherhood. Actually, it is beyond Amazing! 

Do you know a mom who’s stressed?

Or maybe you’re a stressed mom yourself?

I’ve worked with thousands of students over the years to help them become motivated, responsible and resilient.

As such, I get to interact with many parents on a daily basis too.

Most of these parents lead busy lives. They provide for their family, take care of their children, send their children to various classes and activities, and help their children with schoolwork.

This is on top of the other responsibilities they have to fulfill too!

I notice that the mothers I talk to are especially frustrated and stressed.


I’ve boiled it down to these 10 reasons:

1. They feel guilty. They feel as if they’re never doing enough for their children. They sometimes feel inadequate as a mother.

2. They compare themselves with other mothers. They see other mothers who seem to have everything figured out, and wonder why they don’t.

3. They strive for perfection. Instead of focusing on progress, they strive for perfection in their career, family life, etc. But perfection is never attainable, so they feel disappointed.

4. They have unresolved conflicts in their close relationships. They often have strained relationships with their children or spouse, which adds stress to their life.

5. They don’t take care of their own needs. They spend so much energy meeting the needs of others that they neglect their own physical and emotional needs.

6. They try too hard to control their circumstances. They feel uncomfortable when it seems that the situation is out of their control. As an instinctive response, they become more controlling.

7. They focus too much on what’s going wrong, rather than on what’s going right. Instead of concentrating on what they appreciate about their children, spouse and life, they concentrate on what needs to be changed or fixed.

8. They think they can have it all. They believe the message that mothers can have it all: career, family, social life, health, etc. But, in fact, no one can truly have it all, because choices always involve tradeoffs.

9. They worry too much about the future. They want the best for their children and family, so they often become anxious about the future.

10. They try to fix their children. When they see their children behaving in ways that aren’t ideal, they start nagging and reminding their children. But this rarely works, so they become even more frustrated.

Just to be clear, I'm not criticizing mothers! Mothers have a lot on their plates, and I greatly respect the work they do.

But it's definitely possible to be a happy, fulfilled and effective mom.

How do I know this?

Because I have a mom who's exactly like that!

written by Daniel Wong.

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